Are you safe in your own hands?

I’ve got a question for you: “Can you trust yourself to deal with the challenges, crises and disappointments that will inevitably come your way?”

How you deal with them will depend on how you feel about yourself. Being happy and experiencing a sense of well-being doesn’t depend on not having any problems but how you respond to them when (not if) they happen.

shutterstock_157192814Over the years I’ve come to realise that the periods of greatest and most meaningful personal growth came as a result of setbacks and disappointments. Not that I realised it at the time, far from it!  But I’d begun to notice that, Read more »

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This strange thing called love

As you probably noticed, there are two topics that really fascinate me, love and happiness. I like to look at them from a variety of angles, get a handle on them and then share any new insights with you.

I recently blogged about what happens when you change the way you interpret the word love. Everybody thinks of it as a noun but what happens when you regard it is a verb? What would you do differently?

"Can you feel how much I love you?"

I have no doubt that love and happiness are almost interchangeable terms which is why I wrote a new freebie ‘The Number 1 Reason You Need To Be Happy’.

The reason it’s on my mind right now is that I’m feeling really happy which is bizarre when you consider Read more »

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Are you intimidating yourself?

I had a really interesting experience last week. It confirms that learning and growing, especially learning about ourselves, is definitely an on-going journey. I mention that specifically because I sometimes believe “This time I got it!” and then something happens and I realise, “no, I haven’t”.

shutterstock_176813414I have always been intimidated by all techie things. When somebody talks jargon at me I always tell them to imagine I’m their mother and explain it to me in a way she would understand. That always works.

Recently, my mentor gave me a list of things I need to do to make sure my new workbook is ready to be uploaded – which it will be by the beginning of 2015 if not sooner. Do look out for it!

The instructions had been languishing in my Inbox for a month or so.  Me being me, as soon as I looked at the instructions, my brain went into ‘foggy’ mode and I decided that it was way beyond me!

Yesterday I finally decided to Read more »

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Do you want to create a happy environment? Here’s how…

shutterstock_220749814According to Buddhism, everything around us, our environment – which includes where we live, our work, friends and family – are a reflection of our thoughts, and our thoughts are a reflection of how we see ourselves and everything around us.

Here are a couple of personal examples:

For most of my adult life I believed myself to be helpless in the face of the stuff that life was throwing at me, that others were to blame for my loneliness and unhappiness, and that I was helpless to do anything about it.  As a result, all my relationships, including my marriage, my work and other circumstances reflected that belief.

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The value of disappointments

"This is hopeless! I can't deal it!"

“This is hopeless! I can’t deal it!”

A few years ago you’d have had a hard time describing me as a ‘resilient’ person. When some challenge happened, I’d fret and worry and agonise and fuss – paralysed, unable to move forward or make decisions. Yet, somehow, I did muddle through but I ended up drained and exhausted.

That memory came to me because, lately, life has been hitting me over the head, challenge after challenge after challenge but I noticed that, far from reacting as I used to, I was now dealing with them reasonably calmly and competently, without being blown off course.

The reason I noticed it was because I was in the middle of preparing for my Grade 1 Buddhism exam which actually took place yesterday.

One of the sections explores the principle of how we deal with challenges. The Buddhist phrase goes like this and, though slightly paraphrased, it makes the point. “When the challenges appear, the wise rejoice and the foolish retreat”. Read more »

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