A new model for ageing

Ever since I decided to work with senior and professional people nearing retirement – who are dreading it, I started a process of my own around my own age – 67.  Although nothing in me fits any of the criteria as dictated by social norms such as appearance (I’m blessed with great genes), health and wellbeing, and the way I think and act, I was still wondering “is this it?”

Surveys into the perception Continue Reading…

The Downside of Expectations

Expectations are like a double-edged sword – some are absolutely appropriate, even helpful, some are out of date and some are positively harmful.

Over time, as I began to learn to know myself better I started to notice my expectations – the ones that worked well for me and the ones that didn’t.

The ones that worked well for me tended to focus on how I expected to be treated but I also used to have expectations Continue Reading…

If You Don’t Expect Anything, You Can’t Be Disappointed

“If you don’t expect anything, you can’t end up disappointed”, my friend said. Does this sound familiar?
I used to say this a lot and, guess what?, I ended up with very little and that never stopped me from feeling disappointed.

Over time, I began to have dreams. I began to see a clear purpose to my life and I began to want more. That’s when my life changed. The most important thing I discovered was that the quality of my life starts with me, being clear about what really matters to me and then talking about it to friends, interested strangers, even those Continue Reading…

What’s Wrong with Having Expectations? (Part 1)

Expectations are like a double-edged sword – some are absolutely appropriate, even helpful, some are out of date and some are positively harmful.

As clients begin working with me and begin to learn to know themselves better they start to notice their expectations – the ones that work well for them and the ones that don’t.

They not only come to see how they expect to be treated and feel unable to do anything Continue Reading…

What’s Wrong With Having Expectations? (Part 2)

If you ever wondered why your life or parts of your life look and feel the way they do (not good) then it might be worth your while to look at your expectations. Generally speaking, our expectations are based on our beliefs and the main problem with this is that, using the iceberg analogy, 90% of our beliefs and expectations tend to be hidden from our awareness while we tend to regard the remaining 10%, the ones we are aware of, as valid and realistic.

What’s wrong with having expectations? The problem with expectations in general and the ones outside the field of our awareness in particular is that they are in the driving seat when it comes to creating our life experience, not us. Continue Reading…